MOTHERS MATTER
Mothers DO matter. Birth mothers matter. Adoptive mothers matter. Grandmothers who step up matter. Single mothers matter. Women who love, encourage, and help raise children matter.
When I think about the mothers who influenced me, they are plentiful. I am grateful for every woman who poured into my life. I did not have a good relationship with my mother. Although it was not the best, it still mattered. My mother was a mean, abusive, weekend alcoholic, but she gave me 2 vital scriptures that I could stand on no matter where life led me.
“I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” Phill. 4:13 “…..because greater is He that is in you, than he that is in the world.” 1 John 4:4b.
I used these two scriptures before I knew what they meant.
In times of great turmoil.
When I realized I had made a huge mistake.
When I was so alone, I thought I wouldn’t make it.
I found comfort in those words and felt encouraged by them. Those words always speak to my heart, reminding me that I am strong and great not on my own but because of Christ.
Many ‘mothers’ have entered my life at different phases and propelled me forward. These women showed compassion, nurturing, pastoral care, and, above all, no judgment, which I really needed.
A woman from my past, mid-to-late 90s. I met her through a wonderful church I was attending at the time. We all called her Mother Randall. She helped me understand many mysteries of the Bible, especially about tithing. Mother Randall became so much more to me. She always had a smile and a hug. We could fellowship for hours about spiritual matters, relationships, and everything in between. Her wisdom and sage advice are still invaluable to me.
Another woman who “mothered” me was a woman from this same church. Pastor Judy welcomed me into the church family and her family. We spent many events in the kitchen together, making delicious food for friends and family. In her quiet voice, she helped me see my strengths; she saw me as valuable. My husband started attending only food events at first. He was met with such acceptance and love that he gave his life to Christ through this outstanding ministry. I could go on about the changes this small community made.
Those early “mothers” set me up to be a better mother. From an early age, I felt that my upbringing was not the norm. I was determined to carve out the life I needed for my children. I knew what growing up with an alcoholic felt like. The shame, the yelling, the beatings, etc. I did not want that for my children. I became the “mother” I didn’t have.
I wanted to provide a safe place, a sanctuary in my home where my children felt loved, heard, and valued. I didn’t become an alcoholic. It would have been easy to slip into that lifestyle. I did my share of partying and drinking as a young woman. There were times I could have easily picked up this generational habit, but I needed better for my children.
I hope they remember love in all the lessons I taught my children. They are adults now….kind, loving, caring adults in a world that no longer values those traits. When they are disappointed by their actions or the actions of others, I want them to remember they can always take a pause, hit refresh, and come Home to Mother. I will be waiting with open arms and a loving heart. We will laugh and cry and find a way through it all.
In my life, there have been many who “mothered” me.
I imagine there are “mothers” in your life as well.
Women who saw something in us that no one else could see.
I think of them as Angels who came and spoke, loved, taught, healed, and helped us along our journey. Sisters, think about the aunts, grandmothers, sisters, Women of God, and all the women who have been our Mothers. It would be wonderful to say thank you to them. It would be better to “mother” someone else. Let’s leave a legacy of wisdom and love with everyone we meet, encounter, and especially those we call family.
